Jennifer's Dreams
I’ll never forget the summer I changed. I wasn’t trying to. OK, I was, but not that much. I was moving to a new school, and it seemed like a big step. It was. I wanted to completely reinvent myself. I didn’t want to be that shy, teachers pet any more. I could change; no-one knew me, or what I was like before that school. On the very first morning, I vowed to myself that I had to change. I wanted to be a confident person, comfortable in her own skin. One of those people who can always say Life Goes On. I am now, but it was a very long road to get to where I am. It took a year, but it felt like a decade. Anyway, the road that I had to go down to get here is a winding, twisted and rough lane. I changed from ‘Jen’ to this girl I named ‘Jenni.’ Jenni. That’s me. I think…
Chapter 1 – Seeing Is Deceiving
On my first day of my new school, I thought everything through, kept my head high, and walked into that first registration session. My tutor put a boy called Cody in charge of showing me around. He had dark brown hair that swept across his forehead, and olive skin. He turned out to be the most irritating person I had ever come across. Despite his annoying nature, I had to start somewhere. Immediately, everyone in my tutor group knew I was someone who was not to be messed with. That day, I wasn’t the old Jen that wouldn’t even answer a question in class for fear of looking stupid. I was Jenni, the new, confident, comfortable girl.
During that first break time, a girl came bouncing up to me, and started telling me about how the school works. Not the regular rules that they tell you about in assembly, the ones about cliques, and the zones each year is confined to (the unofficial ones). She then went on about every person in our class. She was named Laura, and she was quite obviously one of the popular kids. With blonde, straight hair, kept up in a stylish bun, and a slim physique, she was beautiful. To tell the truth, I was glad to have some guidance. I definitely didn’t want to get in the way of the Year 11’s.
The people in my class (with the exception of Laura) were scared of me. To some extent, the teachers were scared of me. I had a blonde bob, with plenty of black eyeliner and mascara. My shirt was never tucked in, and my skirt was really short. Since I didn’t care what the teachers had to say, they couldn’t do anything to stop me. Laura and I ruled the place. I hardly knew what I was doing, I just did it. I acted, and then thought, not the other way around. Sometimes, I was scared of me!
A couple of weeks in, I got bored on the bus. So, on the way home, I got together with a few of my friends (not Laura, she took the train home), and went and sat at the back of the bus, where the Year 10s and Year 11s sat. We didn’t know it was ‘unacceptable,’ which is how Belle, a Year 10, put it, when she came to make us move. We wouldn’t. Her and her friends tried to make us move, but, after failing, they sat on the seats in front of us. We began to celebrate, and we were rudely interrupted.
“You wait until Jack Brown comes. He will kill you if you sit there,” came a smooth voice from the seat in front of us. I just rolled my eyes, and carried on celebrating our victory with my friends. What were they going to do? I wasn’t scared of the teachers, and I definitely wasn’t afraid of them.
I was sat with one of my friends from Year 10, Benjie. It was morning break, and I had just got out of a detention. Benjie had waved me over, so I dragged Laura over with me, and we sat down with him and his friends. They were the kind of boys that wore hoodies instead of their blazers, and were constantly in detention. Actually, that’s how I met Benjie; he had a detention in history at the same time as me. We were sat there, and conversation turned to Jack Brown. From what I gathered, he was the leader of their little ‘gang,’ and he was off for a broken arm. The rumours said that he broke it in a fight with one of the town’s biggest guys. Everyone said that Jack was not to be messed with. One of the guys was saying about how tough Jack was, and I was beginning to worry that he might hate me, and want me out, when Benjie leant over and whispered in my ear.
“Don’t stress about Jack, you can take him.” Was it that obvious that I was worried? Benjie grinned knowingly at me. I smiled back. Laura poked me in the back, and raised her eyebrows at me.
Although Laura wasn’t hugely pleased about it, we ended up sitting with Benjie and his friends almost every day. Our friends in our own year were too scared to come with us. We may be the tough kids in our year, but put up against the tough kids in Year 10, we were nothing. And even the girls with dyed hair and hoodies, or the guys with hoodies and trainers wouldn’t go near them. But compared to Benjie and co, our friends were, to be honest, boring.
A few weeks passed in perfect routine. I sat at the back of the bus, had a small fight with Belle (which I always won), got detentions through break and lunch, sat with Benjie, got told off for my uniform, did nothing to change it. Then I got back on the bus, had a small fight with Belle (which I, again, won), and went home again. Life actually did go on for a while. Until Jack Brown turned up, that is.
Laura and I were sat, as usual, with Benjie and his mates, when one of the guys came up with another boy. The new boy was tall, broad, with hair sweeping across his face. His smile was mysterious and cheeky at the same time. Benjie mouthed at me, “Jack Brown, be cool.” I gave him a withering look. Teachers didn’t scare me; I was definitely not going to lose my cool over some guy I didn’t even know. Jack turned to me.
“You’re new. Who are you?” it wasn’t rude, but it wasn’t especially friendly either.
“Jenni Jones. And you are?” I wasn’t rude either, but I was slightly sarcastic, with a sickly sweet smile, making it very clear that I knew exactly who he was.
“Ah, you’re Jenni Jones. I’ve heard about you from Belle White.” His slight smile faded, and his eyes turned hard.
“Fantastic,” I said, my voice heavy with sarcasm. Benjie tried, with signs and looks, to get me to calm down, seeing that I was getting angry. Benjie was friends with me, but he was also friends with Belle, which meant he wouldn’t talk smack about her in school. We just avoided the subject in general. Anyway, Jack didn’t accept me straight into the group like the others had, but he didn’t make me leave.
I’ll never forget the summer I changed. I wasn’t trying to. OK, I was, but not that much. I was moving to a new school, and it seemed like a big step. It was. I wanted to completely reinvent myself. I didn’t want to be that shy, teachers pet any more. I could change; no-one knew me, or what I was like before that school. On the very first morning, I vowed to myself that I had to change. I wanted to be a confident person, comfortable in her own skin. One of those people who can always say Life Goes On. I am now, but it was a very long road to get to where I am. It took a year, but it felt like a decade. Anyway, the road that I had to go down to get here is a winding, twisted and rough lane. I changed from ‘Jen’ to this girl I named ‘Jenni.’ Jenni. That’s me. I think…
Chapter 1 – Seeing Is Deceiving
On my first day of my new school, I thought everything through, kept my head high, and walked into that first registration session. My tutor put a boy called Cody in charge of showing me around. He had dark brown hair that swept across his forehead, and olive skin. He turned out to be the most irritating person I had ever come across. Despite his annoying nature, I had to start somewhere. Immediately, everyone in my tutor group knew I was someone who was not to be messed with. That day, I wasn’t the old Jen that wouldn’t even answer a question in class for fear of looking stupid. I was Jenni, the new, confident, comfortable girl.
During that first break time, a girl came bouncing up to me, and started telling me about how the school works. Not the regular rules that they tell you about in assembly, the ones about cliques, and the zones each year is confined to (the unofficial ones). She then went on about every person in our class. She was named Laura, and she was quite obviously one of the popular kids. With blonde, straight hair, kept up in a stylish bun, and a slim physique, she was beautiful. To tell the truth, I was glad to have some guidance. I definitely didn’t want to get in the way of the Year 11’s.
The people in my class (with the exception of Laura) were scared of me. To some extent, the teachers were scared of me. I had a blonde bob, with plenty of black eyeliner and mascara. My shirt was never tucked in, and my skirt was really short. Since I didn’t care what the teachers had to say, they couldn’t do anything to stop me. Laura and I ruled the place. I hardly knew what I was doing, I just did it. I acted, and then thought, not the other way around. Sometimes, I was scared of me!
A couple of weeks in, I got bored on the bus. So, on the way home, I got together with a few of my friends (not Laura, she took the train home), and went and sat at the back of the bus, where the Year 10s and Year 11s sat. We didn’t know it was ‘unacceptable,’ which is how Belle, a Year 10, put it, when she came to make us move. We wouldn’t. Her and her friends tried to make us move, but, after failing, they sat on the seats in front of us. We began to celebrate, and we were rudely interrupted.
“You wait until Jack Brown comes. He will kill you if you sit there,” came a smooth voice from the seat in front of us. I just rolled my eyes, and carried on celebrating our victory with my friends. What were they going to do? I wasn’t scared of the teachers, and I definitely wasn’t afraid of them.
I was sat with one of my friends from Year 10, Benjie. It was morning break, and I had just got out of a detention. Benjie had waved me over, so I dragged Laura over with me, and we sat down with him and his friends. They were the kind of boys that wore hoodies instead of their blazers, and were constantly in detention. Actually, that’s how I met Benjie; he had a detention in history at the same time as me. We were sat there, and conversation turned to Jack Brown. From what I gathered, he was the leader of their little ‘gang,’ and he was off for a broken arm. The rumours said that he broke it in a fight with one of the town’s biggest guys. Everyone said that Jack was not to be messed with. One of the guys was saying about how tough Jack was, and I was beginning to worry that he might hate me, and want me out, when Benjie leant over and whispered in my ear.
“Don’t stress about Jack, you can take him.” Was it that obvious that I was worried? Benjie grinned knowingly at me. I smiled back. Laura poked me in the back, and raised her eyebrows at me.
Although Laura wasn’t hugely pleased about it, we ended up sitting with Benjie and his friends almost every day. Our friends in our own year were too scared to come with us. We may be the tough kids in our year, but put up against the tough kids in Year 10, we were nothing. And even the girls with dyed hair and hoodies, or the guys with hoodies and trainers wouldn’t go near them. But compared to Benjie and co, our friends were, to be honest, boring.
A few weeks passed in perfect routine. I sat at the back of the bus, had a small fight with Belle (which I always won), got detentions through break and lunch, sat with Benjie, got told off for my uniform, did nothing to change it. Then I got back on the bus, had a small fight with Belle (which I, again, won), and went home again. Life actually did go on for a while. Until Jack Brown turned up, that is.
Laura and I were sat, as usual, with Benjie and his mates, when one of the guys came up with another boy. The new boy was tall, broad, with hair sweeping across his face. His smile was mysterious and cheeky at the same time. Benjie mouthed at me, “Jack Brown, be cool.” I gave him a withering look. Teachers didn’t scare me; I was definitely not going to lose my cool over some guy I didn’t even know. Jack turned to me.
“You’re new. Who are you?” it wasn’t rude, but it wasn’t especially friendly either.
“Jenni Jones. And you are?” I wasn’t rude either, but I was slightly sarcastic, with a sickly sweet smile, making it very clear that I knew exactly who he was.
“Ah, you’re Jenni Jones. I’ve heard about you from Belle White.” His slight smile faded, and his eyes turned hard.
“Fantastic,” I said, my voice heavy with sarcasm. Benjie tried, with signs and looks, to get me to calm down, seeing that I was getting angry. Benjie was friends with me, but he was also friends with Belle, which meant he wouldn’t talk smack about her in school. We just avoided the subject in general. Anyway, Jack didn’t accept me straight into the group like the others had, but he didn’t make me leave.
RSS Feed